Dog Has Eaten Ibuprofen

Hey girls!

Sorry that I did all last week reported ncht, but emotionally I'm so happy at the moment just *** en dam.
I did after almost 3 years (next month it would have been 3 years ago) separated from my friend. For several reasons, it was just too vel hat was no longer fit in our relationship. I've made mistakes that I he has one before but unfortunately sauviele errors that he has never seen. Even when it came to our relationship he was too proud or too Sturr zuzugegeben that he has done something wrong.
Since we live together, the separation created a little complicated.
I doubted a bit longer in this relationship had but never taken the courage to separate myself from him because I always thought it would be better. Is not it unfortunately. I have cut back in recent months have no matter what it was and I could not enfach.
Deep in my heart I know that the separation is the best solution. But it does sauweh. He sleeps on the guest bed since the separation and it is hard not to just go over there and take him in the arm. I miss everything about him to sleep with him, his smell when he comes home from work and told me about his day ... but I can him his mistakes that have hurt me to the extreme and he can not forgive more easily reacts only with indifference. He has deceived me, rumgeflirtet with other women before me, telling me how great the way, and he told me how fat I would still (as I am about 60 kg in size ener con 1m70), or that I were more "woman" should be (more than rough ch is not, I love high heels and pink, but when he referred to the "housewife" because he was too lazy to do something in the budget). Something hurt immensely. In addition, there was added to his Eiferscht. When I was with my parents went on vacation five days (I was for some years was no longer large extended vacation and since I am from home I see my parents very often), he accused me of cheating I would. He accused me of cheating I would always, as I at Christmas my Grandma went (I had it set no longer seen 3 years). I loved him but about everything and I was never interested in another guy.
Another problem was then still be drug use and in recent months he has been palpable (especially if dealt with Sene drugs. And for me that is the worst. Not only that he did to me was against violent, but that he did not seen as false and has said I would have deserved it because I am about something had excited and am gewoden little louder. I would have been due to leave the first time, but I have to jump easily managed nciht.
Somehow I feel that this whole tackle things somewhat your fault, I've never really fought against it.

But it hurts. I bleed to feel inwardly to break and I can not stop crying. There is so much I miss him. I try to imagine a better future, a monthly flat abroad and things like that, but I just can not imagine that he is not part of my life is more.

Now the Post has become a bit longer than planned, but it has even been good for the soul of the initially write